Facing His Demons
by HPBPrincess
Summary: After much argument, Spencer attends his high school reunion with Emily as his date. Will he be able to face the demons from his past and defeat them? And will what happens in Vegas stay in Vegas? Based on a prompt given by cmspencerfan
1. The Invitation

A/N: For the sake of the story, we're going to pretend that 15-year reunions are common. Also, this story will also be slightly AU, although not quite as much as my last story. Thanks, and enjoy!

Disclaimer: I wish I owned Criminal Minds, but sadly I don't. I do, however, own the first season, and am slowly making my way toward owning the rest.

* * *

_"Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?"_

_-Mary Manin Morrissey_

* * * * *

Spencer Reid sat at his desk, contemplating the thick green and gold invitation in his hands. It was an invitation to his fifteen-year high school reunion. Today was the last day to R.S.V.P., and Reid had procrastinated till the last possible moment to reply. He hadn't attended his ten-year, and he didn't really want to attend this one either, but for some illogical reason he felt compelled to. He couldn't understand it; it's not like there was anyone from his high school years that he wished to see again. Before he could put the invitation into his messenger bag and get started on the pile of paperwork he had, someone snatched it from his fingers.

"Hey kid, what've you got here?" Morgan asked with a grin, flipping the invitation over. "Ooo, high school reunion, it's in a few weeks; better ask Hotch for some time off before it's too late."

"Why? I don't think I'm going anyway."

"Why not? Reunions are always fun. See if any of those predictions in the yearbook ever came true."

"Did I hear something about a high school reunion? Whose is it?" Prentiss asked, walking in from the break room with the requisite cup of coffee and taking a seat at her desk.

"Reid's, but he says he isn't going."

"Aww, why not? I'd love to be able to go to one, but they don't really have them when you got your diploma from a tutor."

"Do you guys not remember how miserable high school was for me? Why would I want to go back to see people who made my life a living hell?" Reid snapped, snatching the invitation back from Morgan and shoving it into his messenger bag. "All they ever saw was a socially inept freakish prodigy loner who wouldn't amount to much, and it's not like that's changed a whole lot over the years. I still don't do well in social situations, I still make people feel uncomfortable with what I know, and I'm still alone."

"Now that's where you're wrong Spence." Emily argued. "At least for the most part. " Emily conceded, since Spence was still pretty awkward socially.

"What are you talking about?" Reid asked in confusion.

"Well, for one thing, you amounted to much more than I'm sure any of them have even dreamed. You're six years younger, and a success."

"I'm not a success."

"Emily's right. Come on Kid, how many 27 year-olds have three PhDs, two BAs with a third on the way, and are currently working as one of the best profilers in the country?"

Emily continued, not giving Reid a chance to protest. "You make a difference to the world, Spence. You see evil day in and day out, and you defeat it, one unsub at a time. You're one of the strongest people I know. You've saved victims, you've saved misunderstood unsubs, and you survived Hankel. You're an amazing man Spencer Reid, even if you can't see that for yourself."

Reid blushed at Emily's declaration, not knowing what to say. Morgan seemed oddly silent as well. "I may have done something with my life, but I'm still awkward and alone."

"Don't worry about the awkwardness. We're all a little awkward in our own ways, and truth be told, yours is a little endearing." Emily smiled. "And as far as being alone, it's not like this job enables us to have much time to date. JJ and Garcia are the only two on the team who have someone, and they met Will and Kevin because of work."

"What about Morgan and Rossi? They're always going on dates."

"They're not relationships kid, and most of the girls we meet are because of work. If all you want is a one night stand, you'd be surprised how many people want a chance with our resident genius."

Spencer looked at Morgan in disbelief, finding it hard to believe that anyone found him attractive. "I don't know…" Spencer still hesitated. "I doubt anyone will care about my accomplishments when they still see that the genius still can't girl."

"That's easily solved. I'll go as your date." Emily volunteered.

Spencer looked at her like she had suddenly announced she was in cahoots with Foyet. "Why would you want to go as my date?"

"I've always wanted to go to a reunion, and it'd be fun to go to one in Vegas. We always have fun together, don't we Spence?"

"Well yeah, but I doubt this will be the same as us going out for a drink after a case."

"Nonsense. Besides, I can help out with any social situations. I wasn't a politician's daughter for nothing."

"I don't know…"

"Come on Reid, it's a good idea." Morgan interceded. "Besides, you can see your mom while you were there, and I know you were talking the other day how it's been awhile since you last saw her."

"It'd be nice to see mom, but I still don't get why you guys are so adamant that I go."

"Kid, we've all got skeletons in our closet, parts of our past that make us ashamed or sad or hurt. But we can't let those parts dictate how we live our lives today. We have to accept what happened as the past, as something that led us to who we are now. Going to that reunion will help you face your demons, and I know in the end you'll feel better for doing it." Morgan argued, knowing that Reid was close to giving in. If anyone knew how hard it was to overcome the past, it'd be Morgan. He'd held onto the pain of what Buford did to him for so long that he hadn't realized how much it was dragging him down until he faced and defeated it.

Spencer sighed and couldn't help but make one last argument. "What if Hotch can't spare both of us? After all, that only leaves you, Hotch, Rossi, and JJ in the field, and normally JJ's dealing with the press, so that really only leaves the three of you."

"Be right back." Emily jumped up from her seat, grabbed the invitation from Spencer's bag, and ran up the stairs to Hotch's office. Five minutes later she returned, bouncing on her feet like a little kid. "Hotch said we can go. If he needs us, he'll call us. He said it was about time we took some vacation, and that the time away would do us some good. Come on Spence, please?" Emily jutted out her bottom lip, her expression matching one much used by Jack on his father. Spencer sighed before finally nodding his head yes, knowing he was beat. Emily squealed in delight and hugged Reid, who blushed bright red. He sent a quick e-mail signifying he would be attending and bringing a date. Spencer tried to ignore the odd sense of excitement he felt at returning to his past, especially with Emily by his side.

* * * * *

It was nearing the end of the workday, and Spencer and Emily were the only two left in the bullpen. JJ, Hotch, and Rossi were all in their offices with the doors closed, and Morgan was off chatting it up with Garcia, as usual. Spencer slowly packed up his desk, trying to gather the courage to ask Emily the question he'd been mulling over all day. It wasn't something he wanted to ask when others were around, particularly Morgan. Though the other agent, for all intents and purposes, was his best friend, Spencer knew he'd never live down the embarrassment. Realizing Emily was about to leave and he'd miss his chance, Spencer pulled himself out of his inner musings and spoke up.

"Hey Emily, can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure Reid, what's up?" Emily asked, setting her things back down.

"Well, since we're going to this reunion and showing off my success," Spencer rolled his eyes a bit, "I want to look right. I may not have the greatest fashion sense, but I know my cords and sweater vests won't cut it, especially since it's pretty much what I wore in high school. I've got some other stuff, but I don't know if it'd work or not. Will you help?" Spencer looked at the floor nervously, bracing himself for Emily's laughter. When none came, he looked up, though he still avoided looking directly in her eyes.

Emily smiled at Reid's apprehension. "Of course Spencer. Since we have this weekend off, pending any huge cases, why don't I come over early Saturday and I can check out your closet? That way we'll have plenty of time to stop at the mall in case you need anything."

Reid gave a sigh of relief, glad that Emily wasn't making fun of his social ineptitude like most did. "Thanks."

"Not a problem. You know you can always ask me for help."

"I know, and I really appreciate it. You never make me feel bad for not knowing what to do in social situations. I have a feeling you'll be helping me a lot on this little adventure."

"Of course I wouldn't. The only reason why I know what to do is because I grew up in the world of politics." Emily reassured Reid. "And quit worrying about Vegas. We're going to have a blast, I promise."

"Whatever you say," Reid grumbled, though his slight smile softened his response. Emily smiled back and wished him a good night, reminding him again not to worry about things. Reid watched her leave, feeling just a little better about the trip, knowing Emily would be there with him every step of the way.

* * *

A/N: That's it for chapter one. Hope you enjoyed it! Please review- it feeds my muse!


	2. The Transformation of Spencer Reid

A/N: Here's chapter 2. It was giving me some problems, so I hope everyone enjoys it. It should have been up yesterday or the day before, but I was having some issues with the sight. Anyway, enjoy and let me know what you thought!

Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing but the plot

_

* * *

Fashion is the science of appearance, and it inspires one with the desire to seem rather than to be."_

_-Henry Fielding_

* * *

Emily Prentiss appeared bright and early Saturday morning at Spencer's apartment. Fortunately her impeccable compartmentalization skills prevented from falling over in shock when Spencer answered the door dressed in a faded pair of jeans and long sleeved white collared shirt with the arms rolled up. The shirt, while not exactly form-fitting, was tighter than the shirts he normally wore to work and emphasized his physique. Though not bulky and defined like Morgan or Hotch, it was clear that Spencer Reid was no stranger to the gym. Despite the fact that Emily knew Spencer had to be physically fit to work in the field like any other agent, she was surprised that he was so well built.

"Emily? You okay?" Spencer asked in concern. Emily blushed, realizing she had been so lost in her perusal of Reid that she hadn't heard him invite her in. Spencer, of course, had been oblivious to the entire thing.

"I'm fine, just surprised to see you in jeans. I didn't even know you owned a pair." Emily replied, stepping inside as Spencer closed the door behind her.

"Kids at school always made fun of me when I wore them, saying that I was trying to fit in when I never would. After that, I just wore them at home."

"Why don't you wear them when you go out with us? You know we'd never say or even think that."

"I was afraid you'd all think I was trying to dress like Morgan."

Emily didn't reply, merely shaking her head at Spencer's misconceptions. "Well you should definitely dress like this more often. It's a good look for you." Spencer blushed, not sure what to say. Instead, he changed the subject and directed Emily to his bedroom closet so she could assess the rest of his wardrobe. Her compliment about his appearance gave him hope that she wouldn't find the rest of his wardrobe too lacking.

"So what events are going on for this reunion?" Emily asked as she started shifting through Reid's closet.

"Most of the events take place at the Venetian, where JJ booked some rooms for us. The first night is a meet and greet with drinks and appetizers at the AquaNox, followed by a private showing of the _Phantom- The Las Vegas_ _Spectacular_. The second day you're on your own, though they have special mini-events set up at the spa, casino, and various restaurants. I figured that'd be a good day to go see my mom, and then we could do whatever you wanted. The last day is a 'prom' in the ballroom, with food catered by one of the restaurants."

"Wow, your high school really went all out for this reunion, didn't they?" Emily asked in surprise. She'd never heard of a reunion so lavish, and she was really excited that she had the opportunity to go with Spencer. If she could just get him to loosen up a little, she knew they'd have a great time. Emily began to sort through Spencer's clothes, surprised at how much "normal" clothing he had, since all she ever saw him in were slacks and sweater vests. Spencer paced his room nervously, waiting for the final verdict on his wardrobe.

"You've got a lot of good stuff here. Despite what you say, you aren't nearly as fashionably challenged as you think you are." Emily stated as she pulled out from his closet.

"Thanks, I think."

"Looks like the only things we need to get you are a new suit, a tux, and a few more pairs of jeans, and maybe a few more shirts. And we should get your hair cut too."

"A haircut, why?"

"Because it's a little too scraggly, and you looked good the way you had it when you slicked it back." Emily smiled when Spencer blushed at her compliment. "Now, the important question is this: do you want to make this transformation just for Vegas, or do you want to keep it?"

Spencer gave her a puzzled look. "What do you mean?"

"Well, if you're going to keep the new look, which I think you should, you should spend a little more money on better quality clothing, because it'll last longer through the wear and tear. If not, then I know some cheaper places we can go that have look-alikes."

"I don't know. It'd be nice to actually have my entire closet at my disposal. Are you sure people won't think I'm overstepping my bounds?"

"Well, the team will be shocked to see you in jeans, but that's just because they've never seen you in anything other than what you wear to work. It'll be like that one time Hotch came into the office in a t-shirt and jeans because he had been with Jack when we got called on a case."

Spencer looked thoughtful for a moment before speaking. "Well, I guess I can live with that. I've always preferred quality over quantity anyway."

* * * * *

Spencer Reid was a nervous wreck. He stood in the fitting room, dressed in the tuxedo/suit Emily had picked out for him and fiddling with the bowtie, terrified to walk through the doors. Spencer hadn't realized how relentless and what a perfectionist Emily could be until they'd started shopping. For the past three hours they'd been at the mall, going from store to store trying to find clothing that she approved of. He'd never been overly fond of shopping, and almost never tried anything on before buying it. Typically he'd just grab clothes in his size, not realizing that sizes can change depending on the brand and the store; hence, the reason why some of his clothing was a little baggier than others.

"Spencer Gregory Reid, if you don't stop fidgeting and come out of that dressing room right now, I swear to God I'll tell Morgan about the time you broke that conference table in California!" Emily shouted impatiently.

"You wouldn't dare! You swore on your first edition copy of _Slaughterhouse Five_ that you wouldn't breathe a word!" Spencer exclaimed. The case in California had been a mess, and he had been trying to move a table out of the closet, not realizing that it was top heavy. It had fallen over, causing the panel to break away from the frame. Fortunately, Emily had been the only one around at the time, and he had sworn her to secrecy to never reveal what had happened. He made enough blunders around the team- they definitely didn't need to know about this one. She had promised, once she had been able to stop laughing long enough to breathe. Hearing Emily flip her phone open, he burst out of the dressing room, completely forgetting the nervousness he had previously felt, before she called Morgan and made good on her threat. Emily gulped, completely forgetting the sarcastic remark she was going to make when Spencer came out of the dressing room. The tuxedo fit him to a T, as if it had been crafted specifically for him. The cut emphasized his shape, making him seem lean and muscular, rather than the scrawny look his oversized clothing typically gave him. With the bow tie dangling rakishly around his neck and his newly cut hair slicked back, Spencer Reid resembled a lankier, albeit slightly nerdier, James Bond.

"What's wrong? It looks weird, doesn't it? I knew this wouldn't be a good idea…" Spencer mumbled, taking Emily's silence as confirmation and turned to go back to the dressing room. Snapping out of her trance, Emily grabbed Spencer's arm to stop him.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to stare, "Emily blushed, "you should definitely get this one. It's versatile, so you can wear it as a suit or as a tuxedo, depending on the occasion." Confused, Spencer merely nodded his head and retreated to the dressing room to change, perplexed as to why Emily would be staring so intently at him if nothing was wrong, and why the confession made her blush. Now that he thought about it, she'd been doing that a lot today, ever since he had opened his door in jeans. Deciding that it must be one of those girl things he didn't even try to understand, Spencer didn't investigate any further, relieved that Emily had finally found something she approved of.

* * *

A/N: The scene about the conference table actually happened to a friend of mine, right after he started his new job. He just told me about it, and it was so funny I had to put it in, because let's face it, Spencer would totally do something like that :)

Please review and let me know what you thought! Up next, Spencer and Emily have a little heart-to-heart.


	3. Overcoming Fears and Renewing Strength

A/N: I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to update. Work and life has been kinda crazy lately, and to make matters worse, my muse decided to run away. Thank you to everyone for all your reviews and support- it means a lot! I'm already working on the next chapter, so it should hopefully be up soon

* * *

"_If you are carrying strong feelings about something that happened in your past, they may hinder your ability to live in the present."_

_-Les Brown_

* * * * *

Emily followed Spencer into his apartment, suitcase in one hand and garment bag and keys in the other. They had an early flight to Vegas the next morning, and since Emily lived two hours from the airport, they'd decided it would be easiest if she just crashed at his place. Spencer led her up the stairs, pointing out the guest bedroom before going into his room to change, shutting the door behind him. Setting her bag on the bed, Emily changed out of the slacks and turtleneck she had worn to the office and into her customary lounge outfit: a red tank and a pair of gray yoga pants.

Once she was changed, Emily made her way down to the kitchen to make a cup of tea for her and coffee for Spencer. With the coffee still percolating, Emily took her tea into the living room and settled onto the sofa, waiting for Spencer to join her. He emerged some time later, clad in a white t-shirt and flannel pajama bottoms, just as the coffee was ready. Emily couldn't help but stare at Spencer as he fixed his mug of sugar and coffee, admiring the way the t-shirt clung to his upper body.

Once he was finished, Spencer made his way into the living room and took a seat next to Emily, trying to ignore the blush that was threatening to appear when he noticed the way her tank and pants emphasized her every curve. He diverted his eyes when he noticed the hem of her shirt had risen up, revealing a smooth strip of skin that he longed run his fingers over. Refusing to freak Emily out by staring at her, Spencer looked down at his coffee, afraid to talk lest he reveal how he felt about her. After several minutes passed without either saying a word, Emily spoke, breaking the awkward silence.

"Are you ok Spence? You've been quiet all day." Emily asked, concern coloring her tone. Spencer had barely said two words to anyone all day, foregoing his usual spouting of random facts and keeping his attention focused on his paperwork. As the day wore, it became obvious to everyone that he was growing more and more agitated.

A long silence followed, and Emily had almost given up hope that he would answer when Spencer spoke up. "I'm just…worried."

"About what?"

"Going back home, seeing all those people again. The more I think about it, the more I wonder if this was such a good idea. I mean, I could just go home and visit Mom since I have the vacation time and not go to the reunion."

"Spence, you have nothing to worry about. What made you change your mind? I thought you were ok after Morgan and I talked to you."

"Well, I was, but then I started remembering more of the things that happened, and I just don't see the point in spending money to see people who thought it'd be fun to torture a prepubescent boy who happened to be a genius."

"Don't be afraid- it's important that you go to the reunion."

"Why Emily? Why is it so freakin' important?" Spencer snapped, his calm veneer breaking as his anxiety got the best of him. "Why is it so important that I go back and reminisce with people about how funny it was when the swim team held me under water to see if the genius could hold his breath as long as they could? Or about how hilarious it was when the jocks stole my clothes and towel while I was in the shower and burned them and then forced me out into the hallway when the bell rang so everyone could see what I looked like under my baggy clothes? Tell me Emily, because I really want to know why it is so important that I go spend time with these people."

Emily set down her mug on the table before turning to Spencer, taking his hands in hers. "I know that those people were nothing but horrible to you, and the last thing you want to do is see them again. No one deserves to experience what you did, and personally I'd love nothing more than to beat the crap out of the people who hurt you."

Spencer snorted. "You'd take out most of my high school."

Emily sighed before continuing. "Spencer, I know you aren't going to be happy about what I'm about to say, but it's something that you need to hear." She paused, waiting to see if Spencer would interrupt before continuing. "You're letting your past control you, and it's affecting the way you live your life now. You're not the same scared little boy trying to make his way into the world. You're smart, successful, and you have people who love you- don't let these people continue to bully you all these years later."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Spencer, eyes flashing with hurt and anger, snatched his hands from Emily and stood up and walked over to the window, staring out at the courtyard below.

"Spencer, you have a closet full of clothes that you don't wear outside of this apartment because you're afraid of what we'll think." Reid said nothing, still staring out the window and refusing to look at Emily. Swallowing the worry that she had damaged their friendship by speaking up, Emily continued. "You need to go to this reunion, not to prove something to them, but to yourself. You need to face those people and realize that they can't hurt and control you anymore. Remember, you won't be alone. I'll be there with you every step of the way."

Spencer sighed, finally turning to look back at Emily, sad resignation on his face. "No one's going to believe that you're there with me, that someone as beautiful and intelligent and wonderful as you would date someone like me." Spencer replied, surprised at how much came out of his mouth. He hadn't meant to say anything about how he felt about Emily.

Sighing in frustration, Emily stood up and joined Spencer by the window. Turning him toward her, she rose up on her tiptoes and gently placed a hand on either side of his face, so she was looking directly into his eyes. "Spencer, listen to me. We may not be together, but you are one of the most important people in my life. You are always there to cheer me up after a case, making sure that I'm ok even when you're hurting just as much. You are one of the few people I trust not only with my life, but with the real me, and you know I don't let many people in."

Spencer blushed, and though he found it hard that Emily felt this way, he could see the truth of what she said in her eyes. "Thanks Em. I know I've been a bit of a jerk about this when you've been nothing but supportive."

"It's ok Spencer; you're entitled to be nervous and scared. Hell, I'm nervous, and it's not even my reunion." Emily lowered herself back to the ground, though she kept her hands on his face.

"I know, but thank you anyway for putting up with me." Spencer replied, shocking Emily when he pulled her into a hug and whispered into her hair, "I don't know what I'd do without you." Not sure what to say, Emily hugged Spencer back, ignoring the fluttering in her stomach and how good it felt being in his arms, and shoving to the back of her mind the disappointment she felt when he pulled away to go sit back down on the couch. Emily followed suit, and the two relaxed for the first time that day, now that the feeling of a giant elephant in the room had left. As they fell into their normal easy conversation, Emily began to notice little things about Spencer that she never paid attention to before- like the quirky smile he only wore when he was listening to her talk, or the way his eyes lit up when he got excited about something. Knowing now was not the time to try and figure out why she was suddenly noticing these things about Spencer or her growing attraction to him, Emily directed her complete attention to their conversation.

It was long after their tea and coffee had run out that Emily and Spencer realized how late it was, and how little sleep they'd be getting. By silent mutual agreement, both rose from the sofa and carried their empty mugs into the kitchen, rinsing them out before putting them into the dishwasher. Spencer, ever the gentleman, walked Emily to her room, giving a small smile as he thanked her again and said goodnight. A sudden impulse had Emily moving forward, placing a soft, lingering kiss on Spencer's cheek.

Blushing at her boldness, Emily mumbled goodnight and hurried into her room, shutting the door behind her. Spencer, for his part, stood in the hallway for a long time, staring at the closed door, his hand covering his cheek where Emily had kissed him. When the shock wore off enough for him to be able to move, Spencer went to his room down the hall, closing the door before sliding into bed.

As he lay in his bed, Spencer's thoughts lingered on the kiss before slowly turning to his feelings for her. He had always been physically attracted to Emily, ever since she breezed into the BAU, fighting for her right to be there. It hadn't been till after she had quit rather than rat on Hotch and the team, that the attraction turned into a deeper affection. Spencer had been able, for the most part, to ignore his feelings for her, never thinking he'd ever have a chance with Emily. Now, he couldn't stop himself from imagining what the trip would be like if they really were a couple, if he could call Emily his.

Though he was arguably one of the best profilers in the country, he was terrible when it came to reading peers in a social situation that involved him, particularly those of the fairer sex. Spencer knew he'd never do anything to purposely jeopardize his friendship with Emily, and allowing his feelings for Emily to control him could do precisely that. But a small part of him felt that maybe a chance of having something more with Emily wasn't so far-fetched after all. His thoughts drifting one last time to the kiss on the cheek, Spencer felt most of his apprehension fade away, and for the first time since he agreed to going to his reunion, he believed that maybe things wouldn't be so bad after all.


	4. To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

"_What if you slept? And what if in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to Heaven and there picked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if when you awoke you had the flower in your hand? Ah, what then?"_

_Samuel Taylor Coleridge_

* * * * *

_Emily gazed out of the window, watching peacefully as the world outside grew more turbulent, storm clouds rolling in. She felt more than heard Spencer enter the room, and her smile widened when he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her body snug against his. For a while they just stood there, content in their silence as they watched the storm clouds break. Spencer absentmindedly began to stroke Emily's stomach, and heart warmed as his hands ran lovingly over the baby bump that was just beginning to show._

_ As rain began to beat against the window, Spencer leaned down and placed a reverent kiss on Emily's neck, causing her to shiver. Emily turned to face Spencer, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissed him with a passion and ferocity that rivaled that of the storm outside. Spencer returned the kiss with equal fervor, his arms tightening around her waist. Emily wrapped her legs around Spencer's waist as he lifted her into his arms and carried her up the stairs to their room, never breaking the kiss. As he set her down next to the bed, her clothing seemed to melt away, and she felt clumsy as she dragged the clothes of his body, eager to feel his skin against hers._

_ Emily shivered as she lay down on their bed, the coolness of the sheets soothing her heated skin. His long graceful fingers drifted across her body, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Longing to feel the comforting weight of Spencer's body on hers, Emily slid her arms around his neck and tangled her hands in his hair, pulling him down for another hungry kiss. When they finally broke apart for lack of air, Emily could see shining in Spencer's eyes everything he felt for her- love, passion, hunger, want. Emliy knew the same was reflected in her gaze, and she reveled in the feeling of how it always felt so right in his arms. She wondered, not for the first time, what she had done to deserve this man and the love he continued to give her unconditionally._

_ So lost in her thoughts, Emily didn't notice Spencer slide down her body until she felt the deliberate puff of air on her aching core. She arched up against his mouth as he rained tiny kisses along her inner thighs, avoiding the place where she wanted his touch the most. Finally, when she felt as if she couldn't possibly take his teasing any more, he placed a kiss over her center before delving his tongue in to taste her. She arched further, her fingers clenching the bed sheets as his lips found that little bundle of nerves and began suckling. She moaned his name in ecstasy as he alternated between flicks and wide sweeps of his tongue. It wasn't long before she fell apart in his arms, giving herself up as the heat and passion coiled in her belly exploded._

_ Breathing heavily as her body began to recover, Emily felt Spencer slide back up her body, placing soft, loving kisses on her lips and stroking the sweaty hair plastered against her forehead._

_ "I love you Emily, so much," he whispered as he placed kisses along her jaw line and down her neck._

_ "I love you too Spence," she answered, her legs wrapping around his waist and tightening as he slid into her, their bodies fusing into one. As the storm outside raged on, they lost themselves in each other, passion and warmth and love surrounding them as if a cocoon, protecting them from the dangers of the night._

* * * * *

Emily jolted awake, her chest heaving as she pulled herself out of her dream and back to reality. Disoriented, she looked around the room in confusion before her brain managed to refocus and she remembered that she was sleeping in Spencer's guest room and not her own. Looking at the clock, she sighed when she saw there was still an hour until she needed to get up. Knowing it was pointless to go back to sleep, Emily slipped out of bed and went into the connecting bathroom to shower, knowing she needed one badly after the dream she had just had.

Stepping underneath the hot water, Emily felt her body begin to relax, and her thoughts naturally drifted to the genius sleeping in the next room. Given the turmoil of her feelings the past week, Emily wasn't surprised that she'd had a steamy dream about Spencer Reid, especially since she was sleeping in his apartment. It didn't even surprise her that the dream had been about much more than sex, although it had had a rather large presence in the dream.

In the grand scope of things in the BAU family, there had always been something different about Spencer, something that drew Emily to him, something that made her feel different than how she felt about the other guys on the team. To her, Morgan was the big brother she never had (though sometimes she was glad she'd never had one, given how protective Morgan could be). Rossi was like the cool uncle who let you have a few sips of beer when mom and dad weren't looking. Hotch was definitely the head of the family. Though she'd had a major crush on him when he'd been working detail for her mother, it had ended when she'd left for Yale. Any lingering feelings she may have had were squashed at the cold greeting she received upon joining the BAU. Fortunately that was all water under the bridge, and Hotch had eventually become one of her closest friends next to Spencer.

If Emily were being completely honest with herself, deep down she'd felt something for Spencer ever since her first day at the BAU, although then she'd only caught a glimpse of him before the team had run off on a case. Spencer had been the first one to truly welcome her into the BAU family, even before he had known about her quitting the FBI rather than rat out Hotch and the team. They had initially bonded over a shared love for Vonnegut, and the friendship had strengthened from there. It wasn't uncommon for them to sit down to a game of chess on the way back home from a case, or even continue it at one another's apartment once they'd landed.

Emily had been surprised how easy it had been to give Spencer her trust and let him in, something she hadn't really done for anyone since Italy. At one point when she'd thought she was beginning to develop feelings for Spencer, Emily had done what she does best and compartmentalized, not wanting to jeopardize the team when she thought nothing would ever happen between them, especially when she heard about the disastrous date between Spence and JJ. Though she'd been a little jealous when she'd heard about the date, she knew that it was in the past and that Spencer and JJ had more of a brother/sister relationship now than anything else. When Spencer had later confided in her how awkward things had been for a while on the team because of the date, Emil had squashed her growing feelings, not willing to risk the chance that the same thing would happen again if it didn't work out between them, or if he didn't feel the same way. Thank god she had, because she had nearly fallen apart as it was when she watched helplessly as Henkel tortured him, and the hurt of being pushed away had nearly crippled her when Spencer tried to fight his Dilaudid addiction alone. She'd been nothing short of relieved when he had finally confided in her and agreed to get help. It had been one of the darkest times of her life, and she knew she wouldn't have come out on the other side whole if she hadn't gone through it with Spencer.

For the most part, Emily had forgotten about her early feelings for him, though lately they'd begun to resurface, ever since she'd agreed to go to the reunion as his date. The suggestion had come out of her mouth without even thinking about it, and some part of her knew it was because the feelings had never really gone away. Her dream tonight was evidence of that. She'd dreamed not only about making love with Spencer, but that he'd given her the one thing she so desperately wanted- a child. That small part of the dream, him running his hands over her baby bump, had shaken her to the core, and what had caused the shock and heavy breathing when she'd jolted awake.

The more she thought about it, the more Emily felt her feelings resurface and grow, realizing that she couldn't picture having a family with anyone else but Spencer. Though she knew of his reservations about kids due to his family history of Schizophrenia and what the team had lovingly dubbed the "Reid effect," Emily knew that Spencer would make an amazing father. He was so dedicated in everything he did, and she knew he'd be equally so with his own child. And while the threat of him passing on Schizophrenia still existed, the "Reid effect" was somewhat faulty- everyone had seen how great Spencer was with Henry, and how quickly the two had bonded.

Feeling the water turn cold, Emily shut the water off and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a fluffy towel around her body. As she began to get ready for the day, her thoughts drifted to the previous night and her dream. Remembering how Spencer had hugged her after he'd calmed down, and the flicker of something she'd seen briefly in his eyes when she'd kissed him on the cheek, Emily wondered if maybe this trip had happened for a reason. Maybe this was their chance to see if a relationship could ever happen between them. After all, for the next three days, for all intents and purposes, she was Spencer's girlfriend. Emily finally decided that she wouldn't discourage a real relationship if one began to develop over the course of the weekend, and maybe, just maybe, if things went right, she'd tell Spencer how she felt, how she'd really felt all along.

A/N: And there's chapter four. Sorry it took so long- my muse didn't want to cooperate, and it took me three drafts to finally get it right. The first was definitely a disaster, lol. Please be gentle, it's the first time I've ever written anything resembling a sex scene. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and added this story as a favorite and added me as a favorite author. It means more than I can say!

I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can- I'm working on it now while my muse is still wiling to work. Just so you know, after this story will come a short Hotch/Prentiss one, which may become a series, depending on how it is received and what y'all have to say about it, and then after that, who knows? **I have posted a new poll that allows you to pick the next character pairing, rating, and type of story. Please vote!**


End file.
